Parents can add a lot to their resume. They are maids, chefs, teachers, chauffeurs, personal shoppers, stylists... but they’re missing an incredible opportunity. They can add bomb squad specialist on there. I'm fairly certain anyone who can cut a baby's nails can also diffuse a bomb. The steady hands and focus needed during such a tense time is no joke....
And also, I cut her skin a tiny bit and I'm fairly certain I'll never forgive myself. 😫
On a related note-- anyone know what the Guiness World Record is for longest baby fingernails? If we have a goal it doesn't make me a coward. 😂
If you don’t get enough experience during your baby nail cutting years... you will have other opportunities. Like when those sweet babies become teenagers... choosing your words to not incite a blowup is much like picking the blue wire or the red wire.
Alligator wrestling may be an option too. It’s all in your muscle memory once you’ve changed a toddler.
welcome to my mess
I've always dreamed of being one of those moms who makes Bento Box lunches with artisan sandwiches cut out into cute shapes along with carrot sticks and grapefruit that my perfect children will gobble up, but I am fairly certain my child is going to end up with a package of deli meat and a Snickers bar. I can barely get myself ready in the morning and I once screwed up a grilled cheese maker. Who knew the top part of the grilled cheese maker also heated up? Spoiler alert: everyone. I'm not sure who decided I was capable of raising a human, but they handed her off to me anyways and I love her more than I can begin to explain. However, love isn't magic--despite what Disney claims. I cannot suddenly wake up without 46 snoozes or manage my time well enough to have the opportunity to use conditioner in my hair. I'm still me. I just have a cute mini-me now. I have a master's degree in education and a participation award for adulting. Please follow me on my journey and give me a wave if you ever end up on the struggle bus with me. I also frequent the hot mess express, and I check my email on occasion. Wherever you run into me, just know I woke up like this. No, seriously...I didn't have time to do anything else.